Death Toe’s first AND LAST Christmas!!

I got a little excited last night about Christmas and as a result stayed up till about 3am (as you do). Β I am blaming the pred – such a common excuse!!! – but I am also aware that a LOT of people on the support group were awake as well, so yep I think its a valid one πŸ˜‰ Santa snuck in at about midnight whilst I was peeing and left a stocking on my bed and buggered off to sleep… Or wherever. How would I know. He is Santa… But this meant BECAUSE NO ONE WOKE ME UP, I got up at 1pm… Which meant a breakfast of pork pie slice to take drugs with and then being a weird pathetic kind of sous chef with the rest of the fams yelling at me to get my toe out of the way every time I set foot or feet on the kitchen floor!! I made scones yesterday. I’m not COMPLETELY banned from the kitchen!!

Mum and I have been on the cups of tea all day and the boys (broo and Dad) and Mog (our cat that kinda thinks she is a dog) have been boozing gently allll day.

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We did the usual traditional turkey roast and sort of accidentally factored in the missing brother in terms of volume – last year big broo ate nearly as much as the rest of us put together. Yes, I am prone to exaggeration A LOT, but he honestly ate so much it was scaring me. So this year there is quite a bit of food left and we will be eating turkey/veggies/stuffing sandwiches for a few days πŸ˜€ I still reckon if we put it all in a pot and blitzed it with some gravy it would be an amazing soup, but no one seems keen to try it yet. Β The best bit of Christmas dinner this year was managing to get away without eating the two sprouts Mum put on my plate hahahaha FOILED YOU MOTHER!!! Also, the toasts we did. Big broo got one, parents did some nice ones about health and happiness etc… I was getting told off as all of mine were slightly more… Negative πŸ˜€ They involved a lot of addendums and sub-clauses… Such as “To Death Toe. May he piss off really soon. But not too soon. And not in a painful manner. And not leaving a mess behind him. Preferably not getting infected or damaged any further before he falls off…” Apparently you also aren’t allowed to wish anyone a lingering death so they quit their job :O I had to amend that one several times as well before it was allowed to stand :/ Spoil sports!

After Xmas din dins, we did a concerted effort on the pressies – I got some awesome bits for my house when it one day gets habitable and I can move in – including a rug I have been lusting after for a looooong time πŸ˜€ It is so super colourful!! The plan with the house has been from day one to have it very neutrally decorated, so that I can vomit colour and uncoordinated crap alll over it. Plants as well. It is going to be a kind of multi-coloured shiny jungle πŸ˜› Mum shudders every time I expand further on my plans to her πŸ˜€

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See also spotty bag and patchworky bag πŸ˜€ I did well. I must have been good at some point last year… >.< I also landed myself the below, with the plan I think being that I am supposed to use the empty jar to keep Death Toe in when he finally fecks off my foot πŸ˜€ Nice….

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The vast vast majority of the day has been spent in nanoblock heaven – I got one for myself, one for little broo and one each for Mum and Dad – matching minions, Kevin and Dave for them!

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Little broo got a rather intense pirate ship – it is a difficulty level five and he has been doing it so far for… six and half hours non-stop haha that is amazing πŸ˜€ It isn’t finished… I would estimate he is about two thirds done. I lie – he had about a 40 minute break at one stage. We went through for parent bonding and watched the animation of ‘We’re going on a bear hunt’ – one of my Dad’s all time fave books πŸ˜‰ I struggled from the first minute. A lot of very dangerous business going on in that short film. Babies crawling all over dogs. Parents leaving children unattended for hours. The children buggering off outside in a weird world where the weather changes every five minutes and THE BABY DIDN’T HAVE A HAT ON – a particular bug-bear of mine. And speaking of bears, there was a bloody bear and the film shows the girl giving it a sandwich!!! That is hardly sending a good message to young viewers!! I do not watch tv much and as a few of my friends are aware, when I do, I particularly love arguing with it… This brought out the very worst in me πŸ˜€

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I got myself one (partly as I knew little broo would take it very seriously haha) and ooo yeh I found a unicorn πŸ˜› It was awesome – very very very addictive, I have definitely found a new sad git hobby!!! – weather aside: bloody hellfire it is WINDY HERE :O – actually a bit fearful. Yes the house has stood for many centuries in various forms, but what if tonight is the night it flattens me and the cat?? Apparently we have mild snow warnings (unlikely) and JUST into gale force winds outside. Sounds like a flippin hurricane the last few mins!! – so yep. I made the unicorn and it is amazing and I am getting various name suggestions, many of them very rude and I think I am going with Keith πŸ˜›

I was surprised at how much fun it was, you don’t really need tweezers but I have shaky fingers and delicate finger ends to contend with so they helped for the small fiddliest bits! The instructions were also manageable – so the unicorn was a level two difficulty hehe and it took me a good wee while, so I reckon little broo will be on his pirate ship for a while!

One of the most awesome things about being back up in Scotland is always seeing Mog. She doesn’t like me anything like as much as she likes my brothers – her fave is bigger broo, but he is away, so she is making do with little broo and snuggled up next to him on the cushion that she is not allowed on – SNITCH WITH PHOTO EVIDENCE!!!! – for many of his nanoblocking hours, just occasionally swiping at him to make sure he remembered she is a cold hard killer… That is how she expresses her love. Also get to use comb-on-a-stick – a long standing member of the family, used out of necessity as she absolutely LOVES getting combed, runs over to you when you tap it on the floor, but then decides every few minutes to go insane and try to eat you mid-combing!

She also flatly refused to have a selfie taken. It was a very painful process involving crawling around on a slate floor, which I shouldn’t really be doing – and the majority of the pictures had me looking like some kind of insane stalker. If either of my brothers had tried this, she would have sat beautifully and done tricks on command. Little shit.

Yes, I am a nut case πŸ˜€ Note also the very fluffy new hood. Fave will approve when she sees it πŸ˜‰ So I think little broo is sodding off tomorrow to go play poker… I am just gonna bimble around trying not to eat too much of Mum’s cheesecake… IΒ am flaring a bit weirdly at the moment and all of my mottling is on fire – I have very cool spiderwebby purple patterns all down my arms, middle of my back… Back of my hands, which always look kinda mottled, but especially so last few days! Been sleeping in mittens etc. and waking up warm, so not too sure why :/ Meh. Liver is deranged so probably just a side effect of that huh! Until they get some kind of epic biopsy to check if it is maybe CPAN, I will just stay at ‘weird undifferentiated small vessel vasculitis with some kind of coagulation problem as well’ forever. Not sure how they are gonna do a biopsy as well with me back on warfarin after Xmas, if they can’t even remove a tunnel line with me anti-coagulated… [oooo gotta go inject myself, thank you brain, good remembering!!] Which reminds me, I got cranberry body shop goodies as well, which I thought was Mum’s idea of a giggle, as I am guessing at the time of purchase I would have not been allowed any cranberry to EAT because of the warfarin, but as it is I currently can (until the 10th!) and I had LOTS with turkey today πŸ˜€ I currently smell very good. Just doing a cheeky nanoblock shop… They are so addictive. Don’t start……!!!! Merry Xmas to everyone, hope Santa was good to y’all!

DEATH TOE WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER CHRISTMAS MWOHAHAHA!!!

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